Tbslover29's Journals

So...How 'bout them padres?

Dear god. It's been far too long.

I've been pretty busy lately, and buzznet has honestly been the last thing on my mind.
I just had my 16th birthday party last sunday, and that was pretty fun!
But yeah, anyways...

Sorry about not being on! What exactly have I missed?
Any stories you guys would like to send me? I'd love to read them :]

| Death Note | The Swan Song; Chapter Four: Romance [Matt]

| Death Note | The Swan Song; Chapter Four: Romance [Matt]

Five days ago you had encountered some...troubles. You had gotten into a fight with a girl, and her cronies decided it would be a good idea to beat the living shit out of you. Needless to say, your two black eyes were still recovering, the cuts were scabbed, you were still having respiratory problems, and you still had many unanswered questions.

The girls had been expelled from Wammy's after Roger consulted Watari with the situation, and Watari gave an immediate, unbiased reply. The girls had to pack their bags and leave for a new orphanage. It made you feel a bit guilty that they had to go to a less...well, superior orphanage, but then again...your black eyes, cuts and whatnot were telling you otherwise. You'd have a kind heart 'till the end.

You had been excused from classes, and were scheduled to return to classes tomorrow depending on whether or not it still pained you to raise your eyelids. You were confident in the fact that you'd be spending another day - or more - sitting on your bed with absolutely no human contact. Great.

You groaned as you rolled around on your bed, trying to find a comfortable spot to rest. You found yourself in a curled position, but quickly lowered a leg, then decided your pillow wasn't fluffy enough. You sat upright, fluffed your pillow, and rested on your back. You then rolled to your side, found yourself in a curled position, but quickly lowered a leg, then you decided your pillow wasn't fluffy enough...

You could safely say that it had been a bit...repetitive...today.

Of course, as soon as you found yourself in a comfortable position, someone had softly knocked on the door. You groaned inwardly, but got up to answer it regardless.

You inhaled sharply when you felt a keen, knife-like stab near your heart. It was like that every time you got up. So, obviously, you refrained from getting up as much as possible.

With a hand carefully placed under your breast, you opened the door. You inhaled sharply again when you felt the stab, and you clenched your eyes shut. That too hurt, though, seeing as your eyes were still having a bit of trouble getting rid of the bruising. "Sorry..." you breathed. "It only seems to happen...when I try to stand up..."

"Sorry about that, I just wanted to see how you were doing."

You opened up one of your eyes to see the familiar face of your favorite red-headed gamer. "Matt, you can have a seat..." you offered as you took baby steps towards your bed. You eased yourself down onto the mattress, and then carefully leaned to the left to lie on your side. When you were relatively comfortable, you opened both of your eyes. "Sorry again, the only way I can get comfortable is if I'm lying down."

"Don't apologize," he waved, shaking his head. "I...should be the one apologizing."

You stared intently at the boy, awaiting his every word.

"I've been a real asshole. I'm not one to care about image, and I never have. I don't know why it got to me earlier...I felt really bad, because...I know you trust me. You really shouldn't put any faith in me though," he laughed, scratching the back of his neck, "I'm just a lazy dude. I don't give much thought to anything, and I'm sorry if it seems like I don't care...because that's really not the case-"

"Who...stood up for me the other day?" you interjected, wrapping yourself in your blanket as you watched him sit down on your rolling chair.

A light pink dusted Matt's cheeks, and he looked down at his feet. "That...was me."

Even though it physically hurt you, you raised your brows and lids to resemble that of a deer in the headlights. "You? But, why?"

Matt scoffed, "I'm not that mean! Geez, give me a break. As soon as those lies started spouting out of her good-for-nothing mouth I knew I had to do something. You're my friend. It seemed like that right thing to do."

So he's not annoyed by me? I'm his friend?

...Friend.

That's right. Just...friends...

"Thanks," you smiled.

"No problem," he smiled back. "Well, I guess I'll see you in class tomorrow..."

Your face contorted in confusion. "You're not in any of my classes..."

Matt's face did the same. "What? They didn't tell you?"

"Obviously not."

"Well, Roger bumped you up into a class for the higher level kids. He said it had been 'long overdue' or something like that. Mello's in that class, too."

"O-Oh..." you frowned. "I'm not really looking to succeed L..."

"Neither am I, but I somehow managed to be ranked third..." Matt shrugged and walked for the door. "Anyways, I'll see you tomorrow."

You nodded absentmindedly until he closed the door.

Suddenly you felt the need to ice your face to make sure you'd be in tip-top shape for tomorrow.

~*~

You groaned groggily as someone persistently knocked on your door. "Come in," you growled, wincing as you sat upright on your bed.

The door opened slowly to reveal Roger. He walked in, sat on your computer chair and rolled himself towards you, mumbling something about how it was far too early for him to be doing something like this. "How are you feeling?"

"Not so great..." you groaned, lowering your head onto your palms as you heaved a sigh.

Roger sighed, also, "So you don't think you can make it to class today?"

"See you in class tomorrow," Matt smiled and waved as he shut your door.

"I want to at least try," you looked up at him, nodding miserably.

"You don't look like you're too enthused about going to class," Roger stammered, placing his palm on your forehead.

"I'm not sick, Roger, I'm in pain," you growled, smacking at his hand.

Roger quirked a brow, a little agitated that you were being so rude this morning, but he guessed he couldn't blame you. He'd be rather cranky if he'd gotten beaten up by three girls, too. Especially since it would be humiliating, seeing as Roger is a grown man. "Right, sorry," he apologized, standing up as he wiped his hands off on his slacks. Children are just full of germs...

"Well, you better get ready if you plan on getting to class on time. We already placed your advanced placement books in your locker. If I'm not mistaken, your classroom is now B-206. It's located on the second floor. I do believe Matt offered to walk you there this morning, so you may want to stop by his room before you go off to your locker. Good luck," Roger mustered a not-so-enthusiastic grin as he walked towards your door. As soon as he closed your door behind him, a displeased frown replaced the grin. "Why couldn't I have chosen a job where there were no children within a 5 mile radius of the work place?" he shook his head, walking towards his office as he dodged the small children darting past him.

You groaned, combing your fingers through your hair. "Better get ready, then."

~*~

You looked like a mess. Sure, your clothes were perfect, your hair was perfect...but your face...

The bruises on your face were still apparent, and the cuts and scabs were all too noticeable. You knew you were either going to have people giving you unwanted sympathy, or you were going to be bombarded with rude jokes and hypotheses on how you obtained the nasty discolorations. Still, you were willing to endure the not-so-playful jabs at your well-being. You were willing to do so because you hadn't seen Matt in what seemed like forever.

Well, technically, I saw him last night. But that doesn't count! We barely even talked...

You made your way down the hall, trying to ignore the snickers and whispers surrounding you. You stood tall and relaxed, seemingly uncaring to those who were ogling you.

You weren't going to be a pushover anymore. You weren't going to be that girl that everyone used and walked on. Those days were over, and it took you two black eyes to realize it was time to stop being so nice to people you didn't know. Sure, you'd always be a nice girl (you'd hoped so, anyways), but from now on you'd only be that way to people who deserved it.

You breathed deeply before rapping your knuckles against Matt's door. Fumbling could be heard from the other side of the door, and you sighed, smiling. "C-Coming!"

A moment later, Matt swung the door open, breathing heavily. "Sorry! I woke up late this morning...just got out of the shower."

"I can tell," you laughed as you twirled a piece of his dampened red locks in between your fingers.

Matt laughed (albeit nervously), "Well, do you want me to show you the class?"

You nodded happily. You turned on your heel and bobbed up and down on your toes. "We need to stop by my locker first. Roger put my new books in there and it'd be pointless to go to class without my books."

Matt nodded absentmindedly. He shook himself from his thoughts and went to stand beside you. Wordlessly, you both began walking for the lockers. You noted how awkward it was, and frowned a bit. It was never awkward like this before...I wonder what's going on...

"Is something wrong?" you gazed up at Matt, whose focus was currently fixated on his shoelaces.

"Not really..." he lied, still incapable of giving you eye contact. "I'm just a little...tired."

"Ah..." you nodded, also gazing down at your shoelaces to avoid the rude looks people were giving you.

~*~

"Class dismissed."

All the children eagerly got up from their seat and dashed for the door. You, on the other hand, took a bit longer to put away your supplies and carefully place them in your book bag.

"Hey," Matt tapped on your shoulder. You pivoted your head to look up at Matt. "Did you pay attention...at all?"

You scoffed, "Of course I did!"

You gave a knowing sigh, "Do you need help?"

"Yeah..."

You smiled, "Sure, I'll help. But one has to wonder...since when did you care about receiving good marks?"

"Well, I plan on working with Mello in the future - he plans to succeed L, you know - and I want to be of some use to him."

"Ah, right, so what time should I go over?"

"Around 6-ish, I guess."

"It's a date," you smiled, but your face paled soon after you realized what you had just said. "N-Not like that, though! I mean, it's a study date. You know, I'm your tutor-"

Matt waved you off, laughing, "Yeah, yeah, don't worry about it. I know what you mean."

"Stop blathering over each other, for god's sake. We have work to do, Matt," Mello growled, pulling at Matt's oversized shirt.

"R-Right! The project! I'll be there in a second..."

~*~

You frantically kneaded your shirt, trying desperately to get every wrinkle and stain out of sight. Inhaling a deep breath, you stepped forward and found yourself in front of Matt's door for the second time that day.

Why am I so nervous? It feels like I'm about to puke. Matt is a really good friend of mine, and for some reason...I felt nervous around him all day today...

Those girls must have given me some serious nerve damage...

You rose your fist to Matt's door and knocked gently. "Come in," came his reply. You inhaled once more before opening the door and poking your head in. You smiled softly (trying to lessen the pain as much as possible) and waved before slipping your whole body inside in the room.

Matt smiled, waving as he signaled you to sit in the sofa-esque chair beside him. You eased yourself onto the comfy seat and smacked your palms against the arm rest. "Alright, where to start...?"

"Proofs, probably. I wasn't paying attention and I don't quite understand the whole 'Angle, Side, Angle' thing."

"Gee, who were you staring at the entire time?" you teased, opening your book up to the proofs page.

"Tch. I don't like anyone in that class, trust me. I was playing my Gameboy the entire time."

Your heart rate dropped a bit when you heard that, but you quickly changed the subject to proofs to cover up your hurt. "Proofs are Geometric tools used to prove two triangle's similarity or congruency. For instance, because of the triangle sum theorem, Angle Angle [Or AA] is used to prove similarity because in every triangle, all three angles add up to 360 degrees. So, if you already know the measurements of two of the angles the other is guaranteed to equal the same thing. Are you following?"

Matt nodded, suddenly feeling drowsy already.

~*~

"Now, if the sides have a single dash through them, it means the sides are equal. So, under 'Reason' you would put 'given'."

Matt nodded, blocking out your words. He was too busy staring at the movement of your lips to pay attention to what you were actually saying. Unbeknownst to Matt, all of this staring had made him tempted. He began slowly but surely moving his face closer to yours - inch by inch. You continued chattering away, completely unaware as your index finger ran along the text of the book. You occasionally looked up at Matt, but not frequently enough to notice he hadn't been paying attention to anything you were saying.

"So, if you have a side with a single dash adjacent to a side with a double dash, you know those sides aren't congruent," you paused, feeling a slight draft. Your eyes dragged upwards, only to see Matt's eyes closed and centimeters away from yours. You resisted the urge to shriek or jump up in shock, and sat there, stunned.

Your heart thudded in your chest, your eyes wide and your swallows thick. Matt opened his eyes briefly to stare at your lips, consciously realizing what he was about to do. He then closed his eyes, and his dry, chapped lips brushed against your own. Still in a state of shock, you only sat there, eyes still wide and heart still racing. After he actually began kissing you, you found your eyelids fluttering to a close, and you instinctively placed your hands on his shoulders, pulling him forward. You had never kissed anyone before, so the only experience that you had was what you had seen in the movies.

...It seemed to be working well for you. Though, you never imagined your first kiss to be so damn painful.

Mello walked through the door. He wasn't necessarily shocked by what he had seen, but he cringed nonetheless. "I leave for ten minutes..."

| Death Note | The Swan Song; Chapter Three: Attraction [Matt]

| Death Note | The Swan Song; Chapter Three: Attraction [Matt]

"Roger was the only one who didn't notice how much time we were spending with each other. The other guys...they teased me for visiting you so late at night. I just really don't see you like that, and i'm sure you don't see me like that, either. It was just...awkward. I'm really sorry..."

You didn't know why those words pained so much. You didn't know why you felt an uncomfortable pressure in your chest when he said that, or why your stomach felt like it had dropped. You didn't know why you got so upset, yelled at Matt, and told him never to come back again. Was it out of anger? Jealousy? Was there some other girl he desired? Someone that wasn't you...

Why did that thought seem to cut through you like a knife? Matt was just a friend. That was clear from the beginning. What good would a relationship do you both? It would only bring stress; you befriended these kids to help them, not hurt them. Most importantly, why were you still dwelling on the subject?

You shook your head. Normally losing a 'friend' never bothered you this much. It was just that...Matt felt...genuine - right from the start. Instead of you following him around, he followed you around. Instead of you checking on him, he checked on you. He was just...perfect. You sighed again, slamming your fist into your knee as you growled. It was humiliating! Being so obsessed like this. You were obsessed with the thought of you guys hanging out together, obsessed with the thought of him feeling just as confused as you were, obsessed with the thought of a romantic relationship with him, obsessed with everything about him! You couldn't take it anymore!

You slowly crawled your way out of bed, slipping on a coat and some boots before making your way outside to deal with this mess. You needed to talk to him. You needed to tell him how you felt. How confused you were. How much those words had hurt you. He needed to understand you. And most importantly, you needed to understand him...

You made your way down the corridor, not caring that people laughed and pointed at you. Some children gave a small gasp when you walked by, and soon turned to whisper something in their friend's ear. Some of them would even make mock-disgusted faces when you walk by, and then laugh and high-five their friends for being so 'cool'. You felt an unfamiliar anger pulse through your veins. You felt an unusual need to beat up the next person who decided to fuck with you.

This was it. This was the last straw, you weren't going to take it anymore. After sitting back for years and letting people take advantage of you, you were done. Done.

"I don't know how a slime ball like you managed to snag someone as cute as Matt. He must have been desperate for someone to hang out with. I mean, who would willingly hang out with you?" the girl speaking snorted obnoxiously after 'calling you out'. You could already feel yourself twitching.

"Listen here, half-wit. I don't give a flying FUCK what you sons-of-bitches think of me. I. DON'T. CARE. ANYMORE. I spent years of my life at Wammy's trying to please all of you, and make you feel welcomed. This is where it ends. All you ingrates ever do is throw me away like some used up tissue. And trust me, you'll pay for it," you barked, the girl was shocked that you actually said something back to her, but smirked devilishly as soon as the shock had worn off.

"Yeah, we used you, so what? It was nice on our part, you know, putting up with you for as long as we did. No one can stand you, and that's the exact same reason Matt left you and doesn't talk to you anymore, because he can't stand you. You're an annoying little snot who tries to get up in everybody's business because you think that you can help us. Who ever said we needed help in the first place? NOBODY. WANTS. YOUR. HELP," the girl's face was inches away from yours, and she continued screaming even at such a close proximity.

You felt your heart begin to work a bit slower. Maybe...I forced myself on people...when they really didn't need me. Is that why everyone hates me? And Matt...can he stand me? Or is he just like everyone else...?
_

Matt had heard screaming in the corridor where his room was. He sighed, "Not another fight," and made his way towards the door. When he saw a group of children circled around two girls, he didn't expect you to be one of those two. His jaw dropped at what he had heard next, "Yeah, we used you, so what? It was nice on our part, you know, putting up with you for as long as we did. No one can stand you, and that's the exact same reason Matt left you and doesn't talk to you anymore, because he can't stand you. You're an annoying little snot who tries to get up in everybody's business because you think that you can help us. Who ever said we needed help in the first place? NOBODY. WANTS. YOUR. HELP."

What is this girl talking about? I never said that! What the hell? His heart began to beat faster; he could feel the heat radiating off of his skin. And when he saw you sobbing because of that stupid girl...it only fueled the flame.

He pushed his way through the crowd of kids who were all riled up to see you get the crap beaten out of you. Once he made his way to the front, he was terrified to see the girl pounce on you, and have two of her friends start punching you on the stomach and face as the main one held you down.
_

It...hurts...

You couldn't think clearly as the girls continued to relentlessly punch you. You tried kicking, but there was no way you could move your legs as this girl sat on your waist. You tried moving your hands, but she had pinned you down by the wrists. The only thing you could do was move your head, and all that did was make you feel more overwhelmed. The people...some of them were cheering, "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!"

Some of them were giving you pitied looks. Some of them...wanted you to get hurt. Your neck twisted left abruptly, and you let out an, "oof" before trying to regain your breath. You had just been punched in the face. After a punch to the face, they began ramming their hands onto your belly. The force of the hits to the stomach made you sit in an upright position, only to be hit back to the ground by another punch to the face.

You felt pitiful as your back pounded against the ground with each punch. Blood began pouring out of your nose and the inside of your mouth. You felt so...drained of energy. Powerless. Weak. Your eyes began closing on their own accord, and you welcomed the darkness that soon followed.

"S-STOP IT! WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU PSYCHOS THINK YOU'RE DOING? I SAID STOP IT!" Matt screamed at the girls, but they really seemed to be having too much fun to care...

"You know you wanted to see her get the shit beat out of her," the girl smiled triumphantly from her place on your waist.

"FUCKING STOP IT YOU DUMB BITCHES! YOU KNOCKED HER OUT!" the girls finally stopped their ruthless beating and scoffed at Matt, "You actually like her?"

"I do! If you've got a fucking problem with that, then just leave," Matt growled. The girls rolled their eyes and walked off. "On second thought, come back..."

The 'leader' of the group smirked and turned around.

"You were pretty quick to jump on the chance to tell ___ why nobody likes her. So...you want to know why nobody likes you?"

"Enlighten me, please," sarcasm dripped from her voice.

"You're the kind of person that will follow everyone else and what they do. You don't set yourself apart from the crowd. You're an evil, narcissistic, bitch who thinks you're the hottest shit to walk the planet. You bother _____ because she helps people, while you're too lazy to get off your fatass for five seconds to try and make a difference. People like you are a waste of sperm and egg. Get a life."

The girl growled at Matt. She tried her hardest to maintain her tough exterior, but couldn't help but run away and cry. Everyone knew she had a big crush on Matt, so hearing that from him was heartbreaking. Not that Matt cared for bitches like her. The girl's friends glared at Matt before chasing after her, "WAIT! I'M SURE HE DIDN'T MEAN IT! HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE'S THINKING! THAT EVIL WITCH HAS HIM UNDER HER SPELL!"

"What happened here?" it was Roger.
_

You woke up with the worst headache you've ever had in your entire life. And the worst part of it all was, you had no idea where you were, or why you were there. "Nnah..." you couldn't even form a proper sentence, let alone speak a single word. Your mouth felt swollen, your eyelids felt swollen. Your entire body was throbbing.

"She's awake!" it was Matt. You could recognize that voice anyday.

"M-M...att," it was a struggle to even move your tongue. So painful. What the fuck happened to you?

"Shhhh, don't talk," that was definitely Roger. Damnit! You didn't want to be quiet, you wanted to know what was going on! You couldn't move your legs, your arms, or your neck. It was as if you were paralyzed.

"Whut...harpen..." you hoped they could understand what you were saying. Was your tongue swollen, too?

Someone sighed, "You...got in a fight. Well, actually, you got jumped by three girls. You were only expecting to take on one...and two of the girl's accomplices popped up and just starting hitting you..."

You remembered now. Your stomach seemed to churn just thinking about it. They hit you so hard. It was almost as if...they wanted you to die. You remembered looking up at the girls who were so mercilessly beating you, and they were smiling. Enjoying the moment. Basking in the fact that they made you bleed, scream and cry.

You remember waking up slightly...and someone was insulting them...for you. Then you just blacked out again, and now you were here.

You were so confused...who would want to stand up for you?

| Death Note | The Swan Song; Chapter Two: Understanding [Matt]

Your calendar was ornamented with birthdays and celebrations, most of them were for people you were no longer friends with. They were just some of the kids whom you had shown around, and they decided it would be best to break it off with you because you were 'uncool'. They always found 'cooler' people to hang out with, and since they were done using you to prove that they weren't loners, you were as good as gone in their book. But, sadly, they remained on the pages of your calendar.

You had just added another date: Matt's birthday; all of the dates signified a vain hope that you could have a long lasting friendship. Just as the others, Matt seemed to have forgotten you. He hadn't visited you in nearly two weeks, and you often saw him following Wammy's second best - Mello - nearly everywhere. They were practically attached at the hip...just as you two were two weeks prior. Only, Mello wasn't nearly as benevolent to Matt as you were. Mello bossed him around and Matt did whatever Mello asked without a second thought. You wondered why in god's name would Matt want to hang out with someone like Mello when he could hang out with you! You felt a sinking feeling in your stomach when you realized, Gee, I bet that's what everyone's said about me. Why would I want to hang out with her when I could hang out with the coolest kid at Wammy's? You'd have to be an idiot to want to hang around her for that long!

Your breath quickened, and - as if it were a reflex - you buried your face in your hands. A familiar feeling of bleakness and pessimism gnawed at your being; your eyelids became dewy with tears until they overflowed and cascaded down your cheeks. You wheezed, letting out a shrill cry after every hiccuped inhale of breath. This occurred every time a 'friend' left you. You didn't even think you could count the number of times this has happened to you on your fingers and toes. You had no friends, and to make matters worse, you had never had a friendship or close relationship with anybody that could help you distinguish what is key in a friendship. It had always been rejection with you. Your parents rejected you, 'friends' rejected you, boys rejected you...

You were a mess. You figured you were a waste of sperm and egg, a meaningless blob of flesh destined for nothing but death's cold touch. You didn't want to live anymore. You couldn't handle not being able to interact with human beings. You couldn't handle the fact that on this planet of billions, not one person would accept you or take you under their wing. Not one person loved you, or cared for you in anyway whatsoever. It was a grim truth that you had to face everyday, as soon as you woke up from your dreams. The only time you were truly happy was when you were asleep. You would dream of having parents who loved you, who would go places with you, who would teach you right from wrong. They could share their wisdom with you, and set you on the right path in life. But you didn't have that. Everyday you had to wake up to the reality that the only sort of parents or guardians you had only cared for your amount of book-smarts. They only cared to train you to be the most intelligent, not the best you could be.

Your laments became louder and more drawn out, which in turn caused your chest to tighten and your muscles to spasm. It hurt to breathe. It hurt to live.

"Did I...make you like this?"

Your head shot up, and red tinged your cheeks. You stopped sobbing, but the tears still ran freely down your cheeks. How did you not hear him walk in?

You stuttered, "M-Matt, when did you get here? H-How much of that did you hear?"

"Well, you didn't really say much..." he scratched the back of his neck.

"O-Oh," your head plopped down in shame, you began staring at your toes in a desperate attempt to take away some of your edginess. He had seen you crying. How embarrassing. You hated it when people saw you in a susceptible state. You were always known as the buoyant person...and if anyone saw otherwise...they would make your life even more difficult than it already is.

"You didn't answer my question." His tone was guilty, "Did I do this to you?"

"By now, you've probably heard what everyone really thinks of me. And I don't blame you for not wanting to hang out with me...that's totally okay. I just thought I had finally found...a friend," you felt the tears beginning to form in your eyelids again. "It's not singlehandedly your fault i'm like this...but if we want to get technical, yes, i'm crying over you."

Matt frowned, he was sincerely sorry for you but he was unsure how he should handle the situation. "I never said I didn't want to hang out with you..."

"Then why haven't you visited me for two weeks? Why are you hanging around with Mello?"

You hated how possessive you sounded. You hated how obsessed you sounded. You just couldn't help it, though. You liked Matt. You considered him a friend and you were holding onto a shred of hope that he thought of you in the same way.

"I'm really sorry...and I know this is going to sound like such a bullshit answer, but..." He sighed, "Mello is my roommate now. Roger said that I looked too 'lonely' or something. I was perfectly happy being with you, to be honest, but Roger made me move in with Mello. That's why i'm hanging around him. Plus, when you actually get to know Mello, he's pretty cool. My intentions weren't to ignore you, though."

"...Why haven't you visited me, then?"

"I really don't want to hurt your feelings in any way. That's just not the kind of person I am," Matt made sure to make that clear. "Roger was the only one who didn't notice how much time we were spending with each other. The other guys...they teased me for visiting you so late at night, and it really didn't help that Roger said it was unacceptable to visit girls at that time of night. I just really don't see you like that, and i'm sure you don't see me like that, either. It was just...awkward. I'm really sorry..."

"Thank you for telling me that. All the other kids would just leave me and not tell me what I did wrong..." just as you had finally sobered up, you began crying again, "Alright, Matt, you can go. I understand now. Mello is second best at Wammy's - he's someone anyone would want to befriend. Me, on the other hand, nobody wants to be friends with me. And when someone actually does, their lives get made miserable as a result. You don't have to talk to me anymore. You're such a nice person, I wouldn't want you to be unhappy because of me. I have enough on my shoulders as it is, the last thing I need is someone to have a fucked up social life because of ME."

"It's not like that, I swear-"

"JUST GO! I don't need your pity," You shouted, pointing towards the door, "I know what you really think of me. You're just like everyone else! Just leave me alone! Don't you DARE come back!"

Matt's face softened, and his eyes became moist with tears. It was so frustrating to him! His entire life he had been pushed away by everyone he had grown close to. He thought he could confide in you. He thought you would be a friend to him. His past made him unable to trust people, and your past was similar if not worse. He understood why you acted this way. He understood you so well after only knowing you for such a short period of time...if you would just trust him as much as he trusted you...

He slugged his way towards your door, and just as he was about to shut it...

"Just know that i've never had a friend either."

He shut the door softly. You were left alone again to wallow in self pity.

It doesn't have to be like this...
...I don't have to be alone...
He could be there for me...
...But does he have the best intentions?
Or is he just another mindless clone made to elicit my misery?

Author's Note: I'm going camping for four days, but I already have chapter three and four written. I'll post them sometime when I get back.

| Death Note | The Swan Song; Chapter One: Meeting [Matt]

| Death Note | The Swan Song; Chapter One: Meeting [Matt]

They were just faces. Another child added to the competition. Another child mindlessly bred to use his/her genius abilities to succeed the most infamous detective that has ever walked the earth. No pressure, of course, to fill this man’s shoes and maintain the world’s homeostasis by capturing the most threatening criminals on the planet and making sure they get dealt with in the proper manner.

You weren’t here to succeed this man - L. You were placed in Wammy’s because of your brilliant IQ and mental capabilities...but all you really wanted was a place to stay. A place to meet people, create bonds and fill the gaping hole in your chest that your parents had created when they abandoned you.

When another child entered Wammy’s house, most of the children felt threatened and compelled to try harder, to study more in order to keep their position on the ranks. Most children would shun the newcomer, and make his/her life absolute hell so they can keep their spot and improve their performance. Wammy’s was full of ingrates - selfish human beings who had no interest in anyone but themselves.

Some of these children had watched their parents die in front of their very own eyes. Some of their parents had been murdered and they were left with no family to turn to. No one who loved them, just the cold streets they had to sleep on at night. They would beg for money, and most people would sneer and walk away claiming that their parents had probably sent them there to guilt people into giving them money. What parents, though? These children had no one to turn to. And you remembered how that felt; most of these children were too preoccupied with studies to sit down and remember what it felt like to be completely and utterly alone in the world.

You were repulsed by the way these children - seeking nothing more than a home - were treated. That’s why you took it upon yourself to make them feel welcome. You thought that, one way or the other, you could help mend those wounds that were gashed so deep inside their hearts and minds - you wanted to heal. You didn’t want any of the children to have to go through the pain and suffering of isolation. Though, you were only thirteen, you felt that you were somehow responsible for these children...even if you’ve never met them before. You would put them in front of you, and risk your happiness in order to make sure they felt happy.

The children would be grateful at first, but then would just cast you out because they were so accustomed to Wammy’s that the same thing ran through their heads, “You’re my competition. I can’t trust you. You’ll manipulate me just like everyone else has, and you will laugh at me as I fall to the ground.”

Your kindness was often forgotten quickly...and though you gave your heart and soul to these people...you were alone.

“Seat 29, can you please explain the Squeeze Principle to us?” you were snapped from your prolonged thoughts by your teacher’s insipid voice.

Just another face without a name.

“The Squeeze Principle is used on limit problems where the usual algebraic methods are not effective. However, it requires that you be able to “squeeze'' your problem in between two other “simpler'' functions whose limits are easily computable and equal. The use of the Squeeze Principle requires accurate analysis, deft algebra skills, and careful use of inequalities,” you replied dully.

“Good, but not the exact answer I was looking for.”

Is anything ever good enough?

“Now, let’s move onto problem 12 - 98, part A-“

The sound of a door creaking open caused all of the students’ heads to turn abruptly in the direction of the doorway. A smiling Roger waved at the students in the classroom, and with his free hand he placed his palm on the back of a boy and guided him to the front of the room. The boy was at an average height - maybe 5'5" - and he looked no older than 13. He had bright red hair trimmed into a disheveled bowl cut that complemented his still-developing bone structure. Brilliant green eyes shone through orange-tinted goggles; said eyes were currently focusing on the screen of the boy’s Gameboy Advance. “Sorry to interrupt the class, kids, but we have a new student here at Wammy’s. His Name is Mail Jeevas-“

“It’s Matt - call me Matt,” he corrected timidly, his fingers still clacking against the buttons of his game.

“- And I’d like you to welcome him and help him enjoy his stay here,” Roger said kindly, with a sweet smile spreading across his aged and wrinkled face. He left the room hurriedly, and the teacher nonchalantly sent Matt to the back of the classroom to sit by himself while everyone continued their work.
_

The class was excused after finishing an hours worth of calculus problems, and you made it a mission to introduce yourself to Matt and try to get to know him better. You did this with nearly every new kid, though, most of them were rude and claimed that they were in no need of your help. You never let that discourage you - not even when people called you a suck-up or said nasty things about you behind your back. None of them understood you as a person - they only analyzed your competitive nature...and most deduced that you weren’t a threat.
_

It was lunch time, and as you predicted, Matt seemed completely lost as to where he should sit. You figured this was your cue, and after preparing your tray you walked over to him with a warm smile. “Hi, my name is ____, you’re in my math class. Matt, right?”

He nodded, not quite sure if you were being sincerely friendly or not. He had already been pushed around on his first day at Wammy’s, and he was a bit...nervous.

As if you could read his thoughts, “Don’t worry; I swear I’m not like the rest of them.”

Matt quirked a brow, “A-Alright...”

“So, now that we’ve got the introduction down...we better find a seat before they get filled up,” you began walking towards an empty table, and Matt hesitantly followed you.
_

For the next couple of weeks, Matt clung to you like a stray dog. You didn’t mind it at all, it was a nice change from being alone all the time. Matt was a very quiet person, he often locked himself in his room for hours on end just playing video games. And even when you would visit his room, he rarely said anything. He spoke only when necessary and it was usually a one or two word response.
It would be difficult for you to get close to him.
But that’s okay.
You didn’t mind a chase.

| Death Note | The Swan Song; Chapter Zero: Information

Death Note Basics: This story follows the plot of the very famous anime Death Note. Death Note is about a boy named Light Yagami who is the smartest high school student in all of Japan. In his senior year, while sitting in his classroom bored out of his mind, he sees something on the ground outside. After class, he rushes over to see what it was. He picks it up and scoffs, "A death note? How fake..."

Inside the Death Note are a list of rules. The first rule states: Whoever's name is written in this notebook shall die. Light, being skeptical about the whole thing, goes home and decides to try it on a petty criminal. He writes his name down, and 45 seconds later the criminal dies of a heart attack. Light becomes crazed with power, saying that he will kill every criminal he sees and will become the god of the new world. Throughout the entirity of Death Note, Light gains more supporters and becomes more possesed with power. He is helped by a woman who is infatuated with him named Misa, and a shinigami [which means god of death] who was the previous owner of the notebook. While Light is killing criminals and slowly but surely growing to be the god of the world, the NPA [a FBI task force] among other organizations try their hardest to stop Light. Light soon joins the NPA and attempts to trick them into thinking he is not Kira [killer; the followers of light in the anime also call him 'god'] and the entire Death Note anime is a battle of wits between L [the leader of the NPA and word-reknowned detective] and Light [kira, or 'god'].

When L is finally killed by Kira, the story switches to a place called Wammy's house where genius orphans are sent to be bred into the next L - the greatest detective on the planet. The problem is, the current L never chose anyone to succeed his position, so both Near and Mello [the highest ranked children at Wammy's] decide that they cannot work together because Mello hates Near, even though Near seems to have no problem with him. Mello runs off to join the mafia while near forms an organization called the SPK with great detectives in order to catch Kira. And that's all i'm willing to tell. My story will religiously follow the original plot of Death Note, so what I write actually happens in the story [except for the interactions between 'you' [the reader] and the characters].

Plot Basics:

In this story, you may have noticed the title is 'The Swan Song' [if not, you need glasses]. A swan song is a myth that states in the Mute swan's last living moment, after not making any noise it's entire life - it sings a beautiful song before dying.

I used this for the title, because this story will take you through each listed characters life, their views, and if you were in death note and were a potential love interest - where you would fit in all the madness. It will start from your meeting of the character, to the death of the character [Near is actually the only one that lives...so i don't know what i'll do with him]. Each character will have eight chapters to explain all of the given points. And when their eight chapters are finished, I will write eight chapters for the next character. I hope you will enjoy these since I don't do band fics anymore. I figured I had to do some sort of fanfiction, and I love anime...So, why not?

Now that you have a basic understanding of the storyline...

Let's get to know the characters a little bit better.

Mail 'Matt' Jeevas:

Matt is the third ranked child at Wammy's orphanage, therefore, he is an absolute genius. Despite being a genius, he would never succeed L because of his nonchalant attitude and laziness. In Matt's spare time, he plays video games. Seriously, that's all he does. Actually, Matt smokes, too. He's actually an awful chain-smoker and has been that way since he was a child.

Though Matt is lazy, he is a very loyal person and if you gain his trusts you can expect him to follow you anywhere you go. Matt has nearly no social life, his only friend is Mello [second-ranked at Wammy's] whom he willingly follows near the end of the anime.

The first eight chapters will be written about you [the reader] x Matt. It is written in the second person, so it feels more like you're actually there.

Mihael 'Mello' Keehl:

Mello is the second ranked child at Wammy's orphanage. He is an absolute genius and has a determination that is unparalled. Mello unfortunately has an inferiority complex and feels the need to prove that he is number one. Because his entire life he has been number two in everything he's done. He has always been second to Near [first-ranked at Wammy's] and that is what sparked the rivalry between them. To get what Mello wants, he is willing to go to insane lengths. For example, at the age of 15 he joins the mafia in order to steal the Death Note from Light Yagami. It ended badly, though, and you'll read why in later chapters...
He is often angry and you never see him smile.

Mello is always eating chocolate all the time. And despite this habit, he is suprisingly thin and lean. He also always wears leather and rides his motorcycles. He keeps a gun on him at all times and if he gets mad, he's not afraid to pull the gun on you.

The second eight chapters will be written about you [the reader] x Mello. It is written in second person, so it feels more like you're actually there.

L 'Ryuuzaki' Lawliet:

L is the greatest detective on the planet. He has solved over 3,500 criminal cases and put three times as many degenerates in prison. L takes an interest in the Kira case and sets off to find who Kira is. When Light Yagami joins the NPA, L automatically suspects him as being Kira and sends him through many trials throughout the anime. L knew Light was Kira, he just didn't have sufficient proof to get him executed.

L has a very monotone voice. He is always very calm, but he does ocassionally make jokes and they are nearly always hilarious. L is much like Mello in the way that he will go to insane lengths to get what he wants. He once reffered to himself as being a, "Childish person who hates to lose." L is also somewhat of a pervert, though, because of the fact that he has never had any experience with friendships or relationships, he doesn't usually think he's doing anything wrong.

L has a serious sweet tooth and you can always see him with cake, strawberries, cupcakes or anything else sugar-coated. He even stacks sugar cubes when he gets bored! One time Misa Amane [Light's stupid girlfriend] asked L, "How do you stay so thin when you eat so many sweets? I could never do that!" and L replied with an implied insult, "If you are constantly using your brain than it burns calories." Once again, he has no experience with women.

The third eight chapters will be written about you [the reader] x L. It is written in the second person, so it feels more like you're actually there.

Nate 'Near' River:

Near is the top-ranked child at Wammy's house. He is extremely intelligent, but his unwillingness to act often makes it difficult for him to accomplish his goals. If it weren't for the people that worked for him, he probably wouldn't be successful at all. Despite Mello's hatred for Near, Near actually doesn't hate Mello at all. Though, it may not seem like it, as he uses people as pawns to get where he wants. He is seemingly emotionless. His voice is very monotone and I don't recall in the anime ONCE where Near was sympathetic or understanding in the least. He doesn't even really get angry. He always has this disturbing calm about him...

Near is often found playing with toys despite being nearly 15 at the time of L's death. He even continues to play with toys in his early twenties. No one has ever questioned this, however. When Near is doing an investigation, he often uses small wooden puppets that look like the culprits, victims, exc in order to make a point or show strategies.

The fourth eight chapters will be written about you [the reader] x Near. It is written in the second person, so it feels more like you're actually there.

[the qaulity of this one is terrible, and I have no idea why. I'll remake it by the time I get to Light's chapters].

Light 'Kira' Yagami:

Light Yagami, known as god to his followers, known as Kira to the world, and known as a nuisance to the few that don't agree with his views. Light Yagami stumbled across a Death Note his senior year in high school, and after finding out it's true powers, he promised that he would kill every criminal on the planet and become the god of the new [new as in: not 'rotted' by criminals] world. He does so for many, many years until his death. His entire time with the death note is a cat and mouse game between those who appose him. No one knows he is Kira excepts for the select few that agree with him, and work for him when he is "not able to move freely" as Mikami [a kira follower] says. Light was introduced in the beginning of the anime as the popular, innocent, intelligent high schooler. After he finds the death note, it proceeds to corrupt him with power and though he says he is fighting evil - he is evil.

Light has no special addictions or habits. He is just your [seemingly] average boy.

The fifth and final eight chapters will be written about you [the reader] x Light. It is written in second person, so it feels more like you're actually there.

I hope you will enjoy this series, and I hope I will get more comments and feedback from interested buzznet users. Just a question for those who will actually read this: Who are you most excited for me to write about: Matt, Mello, Near, L, or Light?

- Sarah

The Criminal In Me Is No One New - [(--Three--)]

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Author's note: Sorry this took so long, I had this written but I didn't post it until now because I injured my neck for about a week after I wrote it and completely forgot about it. -smacks forehead-

It was all a test at her expense and she knew it. They were seeing how ruthless she could truly be; they obviously did some research and found the whereabouts of her father and how they were connected. They wanted to see her sweat. To see her break. To see if she could handle the mafia life, which is understandable, because sometimes you have to kill people you’re close to without a second thought. But Sarah wasn’t sure whether or not she valued her life so much that she would kill her beloved father in order to keep it.

Sarah plopped down on her couch and heaved a sigh. She had one day.

Her cell phone began ringing. “Hello?”

“Meet me at the office in five minutes. Hurry up.”

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Sarah did as she was told and met Shaant in his office. “So, how are things working out?”

“They’re initiating me.” Sarah replied grimly.

“That’s great news! Now we can-“

“In order to be initiated I have to murder someone.”

Shaant’s face paled considerably. “You have to murder someone? I thought they would have give you a break since you’re a woman.”

“So you knew?” She shouted, tears forming at the corner of your eyelids. “You KNEW that this would happen, and you STILL sent me there?”

“People have to make sacrifices for the greater good...”

“I have to KILL my own FATHER in order to keep my life. If my father lives, I die.” Sarah sobbed. “Shaant, I quit. I think I’m going to move to a different country where they can’t get ahold of me-“

“Sarah, your father is going to die whether it’s by your hand or not. They’ve obviously had it out for your father even before they knew you were joining. This was just a convenience for them. So, in the end, you’ll both die if you don’t deal with this.”

“I’d rather us both die than me kill him! I’d rather him die by a stranger than his own daughter, whom he’s trusted for my entire life! What did Evan do to deserve this?”

“Obviously he made some mistakes-“

“That doesn’t mean he should DIE for them.”

Shaant was silent.

“Sarah, I’m sorry. But you’re gonna have to do this.”

“But-“

“We can’t talk in person anymore. If they find out you’re in contact with the CIA then you will be dead in an instant. We’ll speak through a middle man now. You will no longer come to the office - and your pay will now depend on the mafia. It’s basically your new job. Once you get rid of all these men, then everything can return to normal. But, until then, you need to go. I have a feeling one will be escorting you to your father’s house sometime soon.”

______________________________________________________________________________________

She couldn’t hold her tears back on the drive home. She couldn’t believe what she had done.

Her hands felt dirty. The images of the murder flashed in her head so vividly and with so many gruesome details that the guilt only grew heavier on her weakened shoulders. He was gone. The evidence was disposed of. Sarah would be the only one to know what happened that night - she would be the only one who saw what had happened. Her poor father, alone and cold in the world since her mother passed away...being killed by the one person he believed he could trust. Luckily, he hadn’t seen her face. So he wouldn’t have died knowing that his own daughter had viciously murdered him.

Blair drummed his fingers against the steering wheel of his truck, occasionally glancing over at Sarah with an almost sympathetic look. Almost.

“Are you sure you can handle killing people?”

“Can anyone really kill someone with no guilt or remorse?” Her cries softened until she was completely incapable of crying anymore. “Of course I feel awful about it - it’s a stupid thing to suggest someone doesn’t feel anything when they kill someone. Especially someone as close as a relative. I’ve killed people my entire life. I’ve just never had to watch someone I love die by my own hands. That’s the worst possible thing someone can endure.”

“If you think that’s the worst possible pain you can endure...than you have no place in the mafia.”

The Criminal In Me Is No One New - [(--Two--)]

“Hello?”

Her exclamation echoed across the expanse of empty space. The warehouse was in the middle of nowhere, and Sarah didn’t see who she was supposed to meet.

On an impulse, Sarah jumped and gasped as she felt icy metal meet the back of her skull. Not a moment later, the sound of a gun cocking met her ears. She stood statuesque, though she trembled like a terror-stricken child. “Drop all your weapons on the ground near the door.” The voice was deep, but dry and scratchy. She felt enticed by the voice, but now was not the time to be fawning over some man she has never even met or seen, for that matter.

She complied, putting her hands over her head as she lowered herself to the ground, never once looking at the man. She slumped one hand down and drew one of her guns from her belt-hoop. She was still on the ground and on her knees when her combat books whined under the pressure of her body as she pivoted at a startling speed; she was now facing the man. She put both of her arms forward in a combative position with her gun cocked at the man.

As her eyes dragged upwards she noticed that he still had the gun pointed straight at her, and that the man who had held said gun to the back of her head was wearing an off-white mask with strange - almost tribal - markings. “Who are you?”

The man scoffed, “I’m surprised that a runt like you has the nerve to pull a move like that on one of the most respected members of the Notorious Mafia.”

Her eyes narrowed at the man, no words managing to escape her lips. “....”

“You never answered my question. Who are you?”

His smirk was conspicuous through the mask. He lowered his gun and with his free hand he lifted his mask and shook his head so that his shaggy blond hair swayed from side to side. “That’s still none of your concern.”

Sarah grimaced and lowered her gun.

“Since I probably won’t be able to get rid of your guns and other weapons...we may as well just go talk to the boss. He’s waiting for you.” His smirk unnerved Sarah as it never faltered. He looked so sure of himself, like he knew so much that Sarah didn’t.

She felt scared walking into the hidden room where the boss resided, she thought that because of the fact she turned on a fellow member she would be killed...or punished. She didn’t know much about the Mafia, but brutality always seemed to be a must with them.

That man firmly clasped her upper arm as they walked up the hidden staircase to the boss’ room. Sarah flinched as his nails dug into her underarm and forcefully hauled her upwards, since she was lagging behind a bit. “Good luck.” A feral grin spread across his lips this time, and he flung her into the room violently. She gasped as she landed on her palms and knees; she glared back up at the blond one last time. “And the names Blair...by the way.”

The door slammed shut behind her and she squinted.

“So, you want to join my mafia?”

The deep voice reverberated against the crimson walls of the boss’ room. Sarah lifted her head to see a husky man seated behind a bulky cherry-wood desk, he was wearing a white suit with the top three buttons undone to show a disgusting amount of chest-hair. A cigar was planted firmly between his lips, and when he inhaled the toxic smoke, he exhaled through his nose.

Sarah gulped.

“Yes,” Sarah stated calmly. In a situation like this, if she made one slip up he may easily be able to figure out that she’s not really a badass mafia member, but just a CIA spy that hasn’t yet been introduced into serious physical work. Normally, she would be working behind a computer right now. “It would be a pleasure.”

He raised a brow, “You speak awfully proper for a mafia member.”

“Truthfully, boss, I haven’t been in a gang yet. I’ve been on my own most of the time. I think it’s time for me to put my intellect and skill on the table so it can benefit people besides myself.”

“Maybe you should try being a doctor, or a nurse...we don’t exactly help people in the way you think we do.”

Sarah smirked. “I think you misunderstood what I meant by intellect and skill. I never went to college - instead, I focused on creating makeshift bombs and spent most of my time at a shooting range.”

The boss clasped his hands together and leaned his elbows against the desktop. “What exactly can you do?”

“I guess you’ll have to bring some targets in for you to find out.”

Sarah didn’t want to kill someone, but in the world of the mafia, you had to be callous. You couldn’t have remorse when you killed someone. And though Sarah would always feel remorse, she just wouldn’t show it in order to keep her reputation up.

“Are you familiar with the traditional mafioso initiation ceremony?” He questioned.

“Yes.”

He moved his hand in a circular motion, telling her to continue.

“You’re taken in a room with several members of the mafia. You’re sworn to secrecy, and they poke your skin with a needle and smear the blood on a painting of a saint. They burn the image of the saint and the man who burns it says, ‘If you betray our mafia, your flesh will burn like this saint’s.’”

“Yes, that is the traditional mafioso initiation ceremony. But see, our’s is a little different,” He smiled grimly. “In order to be allowed in my mafia, you are sworn to secrecy, but the ultimate thing that decides your fate is whether or not you can commit a successful murder. I want the body of this man.” He slapped a photo on the table. “And if you fail to kill him, I’m going to be forced to kill you. Can’t let you go when you know all of this now can I?” He chuckled darkly.

Sarah hesitantly reached for the photo, and when she picked it up, she could feel her body droop in anguish.

“Are you familiar with this man?”

Sarah felt the tears prickling at the corners of her eyes. She would have to choose between keeping her life, or killing her own father.

That's right, the drama starts this early in the story. XD
I did my share of research today and looked up a lot of things about the mafia, so hopefully it will be as close to the truth as I can make it, provided a few things are going to be changed to the benefit of the story.
But, it's true that ultimately - in order to get in the mafia- you have to commit a successful murder.
I don't think they normally specify who, but it adds to the plot of the story, so...
That's how it's happening here. x]
Feedback is always lovely.

The Criminal In Me Is No One New - [(--One--)]

“I have a new job for you.”

Shaant concisely placed a stack of manilla folders on top of his cherry-wood desk. He motioned his hand toward the small red-velvet chair diagonal to himself, “Sit.”

The red-headed youth silently took a seat and cocked a brow when her eyes traced over the eight neatly stacked folders. “I have a feeling this job is going to take me more than the usual two or three weeks...”

The pudgy man took a seat behind his desk, quickly lighting a cigar before explaining himself, “Yes. This will probably take you a few months. Word on the street is that there’s this gang that’s collaring power fairly fast. We need to get rid of them. They’re causing trouble for our police force; right now we have a serial killer on the loose...we need to focus on him, not these eight trouble-makers.”

“What do you intend me to do?” She questioned halfheartedly, eyes squinted in distrust.

He leaned over the desk, folding his hands as the cigarette smoke drifted from his mouth and up into her nostrils. “Get close to each and every one of them. Take them out one by one. You’re a spy for the CIA, I anticipate great things from you.”

“How do you expect me to take them out one by one while still maintaining their trust?” She whispered shrilly. “This is the most dangerous job I’ve ever been offered!”

“...And you can’t refuse,” He noted, “We’ve done our fair share of research. Now it’s up to you to use this research to your advantage and manipulate. It’s what you’re trained to do.”

Her eyes darted to his aged face and then back down to the stack of folders. She lethargically slapped her hand on the top of the stack, sliding her hand toward her so that the first folder fell in her lap. She gently opened it, and inside was a picture of an enticing blond man with piercing hazel eyes. “Blair Johnston...”

“I expect you to join their Mafia gang...I expect you to act, dress and thieve just as a criminal would do...”

Her face contorted in shock as a gasp escaped her throat. “But, sir, with all due respect-“

“You will do as I say, or you can expect to be fired on the spot.”

She gulped. “Yes, sir.”

“Good, now, you will report back to me with the latest information every chance you get. I want to know everything about them, I want to know where their hideout is, I want to know who they associate with, I want to know what makes them tick. This is so we can take care of what you can’t handle, considering the fact that these are eight dangerous men.”

She nodded hesitantly. “Understood.”

“Alright, now that we’re done with the basics...I’ve already had one of the seniors who is close with their boss arrange a meeting for you-“

“Why can’t you just have your police come in and kill them there?”

“Do you really think these people are that stupid? They aren’t going to have all their men there. All recklessly killing them will do is get you and the senior killed. They have their resources. They’re smart people, watch your back...because if you leave one little trail of crumbs...they’ll find out. And we’ll be holding your funeral at the local church, if they’re courteous enough to leave your body.”
She could already feel her stomach churning. “So...you’re basically sentencing me to death?”

He chuckled. “That’s a cynical way of looking at it...but, I guess if you feel that way, then yes.”

She sighed and lazily rose from her chair, trudging towards the door.

“Oh, and Sarah, don’t forget...talk to the senior for information on the meeting.”

She nodded her head once more before speechlessly shutting the door behind her; the sinking feeling in her stomach growing more-so by the second.

So, what do you guys think so far? The chapters will get longer from here on out, this was just a basic intro to the story and plot.
This will include eight of my own characters that I made, and if you guys remember Pierce from the last story that I never finished...well, he's going to be in this ;D

I'm really stoked about this story because it's going to have a lot more depth and have an actual plot instead of the typical boy meets girl, falls in love with girl, type thing.

And for those who wanted to be in this, you get to choose which guy you want once I introduce them. And I have I think...four more openings for anyone else who wants to be in it.

I love you guys!
- Sarah

Update.

My life has been absolute hell lately.
I know I promised that I would be on here more often, but i've barely had anytime.

School is sucking up most of my time now. Home life is getting better, but it's still taking too long to change.
School is so stressful. I almost got suspended a week or so ago for nearly getting in a fight with this stupid bitch.
So called "friends" are talking shit behind my back.
Fayth and I are no longer friends.

It just fucking sucks.

Not to mention, today in Biology...we were talking about skin cancer and my teacher was showing us pictures of what melonoma looks like, and one picture reminded me way too much of the mole on my lower stomach. I pulled her aside for a moment and asked her if it could be skin cancer and she said, "Probably. You should go to the doctors."

So, there is a chance I may have skin cancer. Lovely. I cried nearly all P.E period and my friend Julia was crying and holding me too. I really don't want to fucking die.

I'm going to post the first chapter of my story sometime tonight, hopefully. I hope you guys will enjoy.

Love you guys,

Sarah.